"In Poland, Mr Ryder, when I was a conductor, even then, I never thought the wound would heal. When I conducted my orchestra, I always touched my wound, caressed it. Some days I picked at its edges, even pressed it hard between the fingers. You realise soon enough when a wound's not going to heal. The music, when I was a conductor, I knew that's all it was, just a consolation. It helped for a while. I liked the feeling of pressing the wound, it fascinated me. A good wound, it can do that, it fascinates. It looks a little different every day. Has it changed? you wonder. You look at it in the mirror, it looks different. But then you touch it and you know it's the same, your old friend. You do this year after year and then you know it's not going to heal and in the end you get tired of it. You get so tired."
- The Unconsoled
- The Unconsoled
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